The “Core Transformation” technique, IMO, proves that every human behavior, no matter how negative, is ultimately a search for a connection to the divine (or, perhaps, to that sense of peace we experienced in the womb.) As a coaching or therapeutic tool, you work through a client’s motivations, moving backwards through “What was the intent of that behavior? X? And if you had all the X you desired, what then?” until you get through all fear to a sense of love and centeredness. It is fascinating. Even more fascinating is that from this place, lies, violence, cheating, self-destructive behavior and stealing as well as other dishonest or damaging actions are revealed as the “low road” to fulfillment, and the person begins to make better choices.
Lonnie Athens, in “Why They Kill”, states that there are multiple stages of programming a criminal goes through: Brutalization (or violent horrification), Rebellion, Acting out with progressive results, finding a supportive tribe, and internalizing their values. That by the time a criminal reaches that last stage, there is no known form of rehabiliation that can prevent recidivism.
I wonder what would happen if “Core Transformation” was applied, since what the criminal wants is the sense of security violated in the original Brutalization phase. They move away from pain, and adapt behaviors that give them power and security, ultimately finding a “Tribe” of like-minded people who provide him support for his values, values designed to prevent the Brutalization from ever happening again. But what if that criminal felt genuinely secure and connected? Could you then un-hook their behavior from the survival drive that motivates it, allowing them to change?
Perhaps so. The HERO’S JOURNEY details the movement from one level of energy and integration to another, as if strata of Maslow’s Hierarchy. It might be seen as the reverse of Athen’s descent into homicidal hell. Positive and negative could be mapped as a sort of Yin-Yang whole. If you combine the HJ and the Chakras, keeping in mind that the pattern can go up and down or sideways, you can glimpse a dynamic sphere of human interaction that is uniquely powerful.
Pull back for a moment.
If you look at any goal you desire, you can push yourself toward it with fear, or pull yourself toward it with love. Sadly, people who are “fear” driven often don’t even believe the love approach is possible. In a similar way, they cannot believe that if you BEGIN with the feeling of satisfaction, accomplishment and joy they think they can only experience at the END step of accomplishment, you will languish and stagnate. That’s an unfortunate view of human nature, and I wouldn’t want to live in their skin. That would either be a negative view of themselves, or a very bleak view of others. Maybe both.
The idea that you “don’t accomplish to be happy, but happily accomplish” is the attitude being described here, based on the notion that it is our natural state to evolve as individuals as well as a species. You can explore this question for yourself: if you were happy, fulfilled, joyful…would you accomplish more or less? I suggest that this cannot be resolved with thought experiments, or observations of people on drugs (“those lotus eaters are happy, and they don’t do anything at all!” isn’t half as clever an argument as one might think.)
Are you willing to try an experiment for, say, seven days, just one week, to find out for yourself? If not, frankly, your opinion on the matter is probably driven by guilt and fear-based programming given to you in childhood, and I can only offer you sympathy.
But the rest of you? Buckle up.
- Start with deep diaphragmatic breathing, sixty seconds every three hours. This short-circuits the “stress into strain” “fight or flight” response.
- Expand the Morning session out. In addition to the breathing create a Morning Ritual of motion, emotion, and mental focus lasting 10-20 minutes. Move through gratitude, goals, affirmations, and visualization of your goals WHILE YOU MOVE YOUR BODY.
- FLOOD yourself with gratitude for past blessings. If you think you have none, YOU ARE LYING TO YOURSELF. If you lost your eyesight, would you be unhappy? Wish you had it back? Then, dammit, why not celebrate it now!! No human child can survive unless it was nurtured at some point. If you have to go all the way back to THAT memory, or imagined embrace, then do it. It is a starting place. A foundation on which to build.
- Swear that you will protect and love your own heart, essence, “inner child” with everything you’ve got. With all the love hard-wired genetically into human adults, the protectiveness for the helpless child that is pan-cultural and even pan-species. Go deep. Go deep enough, and all that remains is love. Connect to this, and you can root out all the damage and disappointment, discover a source of power you’ve never known.
- Know WHAT you want, and WHY you want it BEFORE you decide HOW you will do it. You must place yourself in a positive, powerful state before you brainstorm or mastermind answers. This is like rising up in a balloon. As you ascend you see more and more of the territory. If you know you’re trying to get to a specific mountain, by rising up you can orient yourself for another day. Then you “just” problem solve what you need to do THAT day, one day at a time, and if you do that day after day, you’ll reach the mountain, every time.
After connecting with your love, and clearly visualizing your goal, and flooding yourself with positive emotions, NOW you are ready for your day. Do this for just seven days. In the morning, list the things you need to do to move toward this outcome, while filled with the positive emotions you will experience by reaching it. At the end of the day track your progress.
Do this for seven days, and you’ll be shocked by how much more you achieve, and how much fun you had doing it.
Remember: WHAT you want, only then WHY you want it, only then HOW you will spend your time and energy. If you need a map to get there, study the lives of people who have accomplished similar things starting from similar (or worse) circumstances, to learn how they managed their energy, time, mental focus, emotions, and actions (or for NLP people: Belief Systems, Mental Syntax, and Physiology).
If you can read this, I promise you that there are people who had less, and did better, than you. The only question is: do you love yourself enough to try the experiment?
If you do, I’ll be right here cheering for you. If not…god DAMN whoever poisoned you against your own heart. I promise you didn’t do it to yourself. And I’ll keep fighting to ally myself with the part of you trying to get out of that trap. And swear I’ll never stop.